Whatever Magazine

mini-Trump

Are you a wee fella with blondish implants who can say, "You're fired?" Casting wants to see you.

something new to be scared of

This whoole AIDS porn thing is worring me. They use fake names, so how am I supposed to tell is "Persia" is the Providence, RI or LA Persia? Hmm? No more trips to the east for me.
Check the list and make sure your Persia ain't on it.

http://www.aim-med.org/Quarantine.html

four twenty

dude like we should all take the day off and like go get a bag and like smoke it up man. today is like a holiday for our people, if you are reading this at work go home. if we all did it the like planet would shut down and like have to take a toke man.

stop emailing me this shit.

Early Birthday suggestion

Ya know how you don't know you need something until you see it? Well I never thought about a portrait of me and Stevie Nicks until I found this guy. Now I've got to get me one of these. How some people find their niche is beyond me.

Check the site if you want one.
http://www.johannas-art.com/Portraits.htm

I'd rather have a Gucci iPod case
http://www.gucci.com/product-shots/us-english/ss04_gf_125848_F06KR_9791.html

Bye Bye FNX

So Providence is now a 1 radio station town. WBRU is all that's left for 'alternative'. WFNX sold out to some fucking sports station and went away. Thanks. Now we Rhode Islanders have a choice between WBRU's repeat playlist of the same crap, or WHJY's crappy classic rock and Dino DJ's. I can't get WBCN or WFNX, or WAAF down here. WFNX had a bunch of stations from Maine to Conn, now RI has been dumped. We still have the free Phoenix (part of the FNX empire) newspaper in our town, but not the radio station. Gee thanks.

Thanks WFNX. You suck.

Sorry Kids, No Comments

The spammers selling penis enlargement products, casinos and free porn have forced me to shut down the comments function. The Whatever mailbox is full of spam; I'm deleting at least 100 a day without even looking at the addresses. So now there's no way to get in touch with us. One bad apple with some limp dick ointment...

If I had a Million Dollars

I'd buy a Country Wax Museum!! Imagine the wax fun I could have with my own wax Patsy. Autographs, clothes, the whole works. Send me money via paypal so I can buy this, retire, and move to Dollywood.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=15825&item=2393694283&rd=1

I'm soooo queer

So 90 days until I might have a dog. Its driving me nuts. Every kid I saw this weekend had some little dog. Its like God is taunting me with this shit. Finally I figured it out- McDonalds is giving the kids of America small stuffed dogs in their Happy Meals.
Long story short, I showed up at the local McD's and made the girl behind the counter find me a Golden Retreiver toy. I lied and said it was for my kids. I don't even have kids.
Now I have the toy, so Na na na na na na.

96 days until....

finally

Looks like the Jolly Green Giant was first.

old news new year

On a special two-hour 'Dateline NBC' Friday (April 2) at 8 PM ET/PT, they will explore what really happened to Nirvana singer Kurt Cobain ten years after his apparent suicide. The website's preview states that "Courtney Love faces new controversy."

New controversy? Sure. I wonder how old this story is? I wonder if some idiot has written (poorly) about this in some alternative magazine or something. Hmm.........